I'm slightly hungover this morning.
But actually it's not my fault.
You see, last Friday I lost my left contact in a drunken stupor and then realized I was out.
This may not seem like a big deal except that I am blind as a bat (with cataracts). I mean, I can't see the big E on the chart, it is really embarrassing, actually. Do you know what it's like for a doctor to laugh at you? And not a chortle either, a full out belly laugh. I'm glad my vision is so funny to you.
So anyway, my mom ran by the eye doctor for me and grabbed an extra contact for me until my new shipment comes in. Because I don't like to wear my glasses to the bar on Friday or Saturday. Not because I don't like them, just because I am truly afraid they will fall off in the crowd and I will have to grope my way home and will probably get hit by a bus or fall in a sewer or perhaps try to enter the wrong apartment.
These are also possibilities if I have my glasses, but drink rumplemintz.
So anyway, the parentals pick up the roomie and me and we bump the escalade down the street to Sangria, a lovely little tapas bar.
I hadn't had anything alcohol related in 22 hours so of course I went for the dirty martini. I do have a complaint that when you say your tini comes with "feta stuffed olives" it should not be 2 tiny kalamatas with some feta cheese floating in my vodka. but whatever, it took the edge off.
And it gave me something to put in my system until those tasty little bacon wrapped dates arrived.
I think Red Wine and I are going to have a threesome with bacon wrapped dates this weekend. And then go Big Love style and share a house and backyard, because let me tell you something, there is no better combo in this world than bacon, date, feta, and almonds. Nada. Capiche?
I started this post with some idea about cheese but it's totally gone now.
I want to talk about this little restaurant.
I had been once before but last night was fun.
First of all, I prefer going out with my parents over most of my friends these days, so that's an added bonus.
Then, we get seated next to the band.
And for some reason, the owner seemed to really like us. He sent the belly dancer outside to the patio so we could see her. Thank GOD my dad found a couple of dollars so we could pretend like we were at a strip club and shove bills in her jingling pants.
Quote of the night: "Aren't belly dancers supposed to...NOT....have a belly? Kinda flabby" -Dad
I don't really remember where I was going with this.
It's probably a really boring post for anyone reading it.
To sum it up, I got to eat rabbit, shrimp, lobster, and mousaka which I think had beef in it, all in one sitting. And we all know how much I love to gobble up little animals. Carnivore Courtney rarrrr.
Then the waiter popped out of nowhere and gave us a free bottle of wine after the bill had been paid. Okay? Thanks, brah. Because it's wednesday and I needed a stiff martini and 2 bottles o' red. So then I got trashed and there's a third of the bottle left sitting on our kitchen counter.
And I think I might still be slightly intoxicated which would explain why I can;t get my shit together this morning, spilled coffee all over myself, and haven;t been bothered the slightest by either. It also explains why I just used two semi-colons for apostrophes and would rather write a new sentence to acknowledge it rather than just change it.
And I have also been wondering....are there people in the world who poop without peeing first?
It's really bothering me.
Just had to get that off my chest.
(The thought not the poop)
Sorry for being random and boring.
god, I need to go home.